Featured Screenplay: The Passion of The Geek

old-typewriter

Not my actual typewriter.

So, I had the idea for a new feature in the site. I call it Featured Screenplay, so what I’ll do is, I’ll share some of my screenplays with some thoughts about them and if you would like to know more about them just let me know.

I’m going to start with my first real endeavor into screenwriting, I started this one a long time ago, even before “Skyscraper”. Back at University, after I completed my first (totally over-written) romantic drama (no, I wont tell that story), I decided to get rid of all that drama crap and write something funny.

I combined some of my experiences (yes, the script was a bit like therapy) and some crap I made up in my spare time and turned it into a fairly personal story that is so completely out there that even I can’t take myself serious anymore. The script is full with half-baked ideas I once had (my unfinished time-travel TV show), strange characters and scenes that are blatantly stolen from classic movies.

I called this magnum opus “The Passion of the Geek” and even though the script has many flaws, I still remember it very fondly. The “hero” of the story is Ben, basically a movie version of me, which gets confusing when Ben has to convince me, yes me Greg, to help him rewrite the movie.

Yes, it’s quite strange.

I break the fourth wall a lot and the script makes fun of certain romantic comedy tropes. I tried to write a movie with jokes for people like me, a lot of meta-jokes and some nice references. It is really important though, that I don’t consider it a spoof movie. I’m not the biggest fan of recent spoof movies and I tried to avoid their biggest mistakes and focused more on timeless pop culture than on recent hits.

“The Passion of the Geek” probably not my most original work (hell, even the title is kind of stolen) but I’d argue that the the script is more than the sum of its parts. Maybe you read it and be the judge of that. I include a little sample here. Feel free to comment and critique it.

EXT. OLD FACTORY, PARTY LOCATION – NIGHT

Amy and Ben are standing in front of the old factory. Full moon above them. It is a really romantic setting. Amy seems a bit uncomfortable with the situation.

AMY

Okay, what is it?

BEN

Long or short version.

AMY

Make it short.

BEN

Short then.

(deep breath)

Amy, it has been a long time since the day we met and I wanted to say this a million times but I never had the guts to. But now, thanks to Olga, I just have to tell you how much I love you.

Ben feels relieved. The weight of the world has just fallen off him.

AMY

Who’s Olga?

BEN

Never mind, forget about Olga. Olga is not important. I just really like you and I hope that you like me too.

Amy is moved by Ben’s honesty and she is sad that she has to disappoint him.

AMY

Listen Ben, you are a really nice guy and I really like you too but I’m sorry, there is someone else.

The echo of the “someone else” travels around the world.

Ben tries to hide his disappointment.

BEN

It’s okay I expected that to happen, but it was important for me to let you know how I feel. Is it too late to play the friendship card?

AMY

No it isn’t. I would love to have a friend like you.

BEN

Friends then?

AMY

Yes Friends.

She smiles and kisses him on the cheek. The image freezes and the picture quality changes.

INT. TV ROOM – NIGHT

The footage of Amy and Ben kissing is shown on a TV. Ben stands next to the TV.

BEN

(to the audience)

That’s what I call crash and burn, I got totally friendzoned but you have to admit that I stayed cool. I could have freaked out, but I stayed cool. But let’s press rewind and watch it again.

He presses rewind and the video rewinds.

BEN

Where I got the video? The Internet where else? But now look how I experienced it.

The TV shows the scene from before.

BEN (IN TV)

I just really like you and I hope you could like me too.

AMY (IN TV)

Listen Ben, you are a really nice guy and I really like you too but I’m sorry, there is someone else.

Her eyes start glowing red. She takes her hand and rams it into Ben’s chest. She rips his heart out. She holds the beating heart in her hand and LAUGHS LIKE A SUPER VILLAIN. Then she throws it on the ground and stomps on it.

BEN

I need a drink.

Ben walks away from the TV.

EXT. OLD FACTORY, PARTY LOCATION – NIGHT

Amy and Ben are walking back into the Building.

AMY

Wanna know something funny? Back when we met, you know the accident and everything?

BEN

Yeah, sure how could I forget.

AMY

I kind of had a crush on you.

BEN

Really?

AMY

Yes.

Amy smiles.

INT. TV ROOM – NIGHT

EVIL AMY on the TV screen kicks Ben in his testicles.

This is one of my favorite scenes and shows the kind of humor the screenplay uses. I hope you liked it.

The current version of “The Passion of the Geek” is 102 pages long and was last revised in October 2016. So if you’re interested in a half-baked strange comedy for total geeks, drop me a line.

About Greg

Greg writes, teaches and sleeps. Sometimes he plays D&D.
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